Maybe it is the steroid induced insomnia in part but I have had a lot of time in prayer lately- maybe it is because I am more desperate.
I keep thinking about GRATITUDE- not 𝙖𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙧 but in the MIDST of hardship.
I am choosing to be grateful today in the places in my life where the most is challenged. It feels like things are breaking apart and it is painful but those are also the places I see God rebuilding. He is gently dismantling trust I’ve put in things not of Him. This week feels really hard; second opinions from doctors, lots of battling fear of the future, and I feel like impossible medical decisions. There is deep pain and hurt in so many dear friend’s lives and so much unknown.
Then I read these words again,
“I will praise the LORD at all times….I prayed to the LORD, and he answered me.
He freed me from all my fears.”
In my restlessness this morning I heard, 𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆. 𝑪𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒖𝒅𝒆. A gentle but unrelenting reminder that control is a burden and not a blessing. There are things I’m not meant to fix, or hustle for, or fully understand. 𝑯𝒆 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝑹𝑬𝑬.
And I can Be Grateful that I do not have to carry the hard alone. I am grateful today; for the mess and the beauty and choosing to delight in the unknown because I’m living close to & desperate for His freedom & grace. Love to you friends.